Saturday, March 30, 2013

Exotic Toy Store

I was on a walk with my mum when I came across an "Exotic Toy Store". I have been dying to go and check it out ever since. Only problem, no one to check it out with. I'm not going to go there alone, that's just....weird. What to do? *deep sigh*

Wednesday, March 27, 2013

Sans Bra Sunday

Today was senior skip day - our school actually organises it, which I think is pretty cool of the school to do. It felt kind of like a sunday. A rest day, but with school tomorrow. Either way, woke up at noon. Fucking awesome. And pretty much didn't wear a bra all day. My tits could actually breathe. What a relief. So I had an interesting conversation with this really nice guy. Hopefully people won't take it the wrong way. It's so fucking annoying. Can I not talk to a guy, whom I normally don't talk to, without everyone thinking I'm into the guy? Last time I tried it, well, I was walking down the stairs in starbucks and the guy and his friends were there. His friends were all like, "woooo name-of-the-guy! she's come just for you." I mean seriously. Grow the fuck up. Cannot wait for college.

BTW - should totally make "Sans Bra Sunday" a thing.

Saturday, March 23, 2013

Brooding Loner Boy

I just watched the 2012 version of "Blue Lagoon". I'm speechless. Not really...I have a lot to say. Who doesn't want to be swept away on their feet by a brooding loner boy? Actually, who doesn't want to be swept of their feet by a guy who says that "if okay is a grain of sand, then you're the whole beach"? College, here's hoping I find someone like that^^.

Friday, March 22, 2013

Prom & Pre-Notions

Prom is right around the corner. I don't think my friends are going because they are juniors and prom this year costs A LOT. I wish someone would ask me to prom. But we all know that's never going to happen. The second novel I am currently writing is dejecting, and I relate with the female protagonist. The guy doesn't want to be seen with her because he cares what others think. No one else is willing to get to know her because of pre-notions and immaturity that disallows them to look past their judgemental asses. My life has pretty much been like this. Hopefully it ends on a different and better path than the girl in my book does. College is not exactly right around the corner, but it's somewhat close. I cannot wait to meet people who are open-minded and don't breathe judgement.

Thursday, March 21, 2013

"A Sapphire Rose" - And No, I Do Not Condone Incest


This, my dear child, is not your typical fairytale. So if you are looking to read one, I suggest you go to the children’s section in the nearest library. The story, however, does take place in a land of enchantment - the same land from which all fairytale characters come from. You have heard of all the princes’ and princesses’ stories, but the one I am about to tell you is like no other. Have you ever heard of the grand Prince Zachery Blanchard, or the lowly miss Shaiya Dupane? No, right? Well now you are going to.

King Harold Blanchard was a righteous man who ruled the grand kingdom of Perlaine with benevolence and fair judgement. When one would do wrong, the King would not lock them up in a dungeon, but rather send them to help build monuments of the land - under supervision of course. He refused to rule his kingdom through fear, but rather, through inspiring love in all of his subjects. Nevertheless, no one is perfect. His one weakness was his poor control over his lust. He had had a wife - the beautiful Queen Castiny Blanchard. Whilst childbirth, the doctor could save either the mother, or the child. The Queen, without hesitation, gave up her life in order to save their son, Zachery. After the Queen’s death, King Harold continued to justly rule the land. He was lacking the feeling of being loved though. Though his wife left him with a beloved heir to the throne, she also left him with an eternal void carved into his painfully beating heart. Trying to fill that void, King Harold succumbed to affairs, which managed to temporarily stuff the gaps. He had lain with many a woman, but only impregnated one of them - Ferline Dupane. She agreed not to tell anyone so long as the King let her keep her job and provide for their child and her.

Being the future king, Zachery was home-schooled. He was fed-up, and wanted to meet new people. Expressing his desires, his father threw him a ball where he invited all the children of the land. At the formal, Zachery met with many children of varied ages. Although he got what he wanted - the opportunity to make friends - he still felt something was lacking. He needed to get away from the party, so he decided to take a walk outside. Starting to yell at a girl - of around the same age - Zachery reprimanded her for picking a single rose from the garden that his mother had once tended to. He was infuriated as the girl had picked a rare sapphire rose that did not grow on bushes, but rather on trees. A single tear rolled down the girl’s cheek as the prince chastised her. Upon seeing the droplet, Zachery profusely apologized to her, and explained as to why he was angered. He expressed regret as he told the girl why he acted the way he acted, and that it was an over-reaction. Upon seeing the girl smile, Zachery, himself, picked another rose from the symbolically ethereal tree and placed it in her hands. The girl simply smiled, and disappeared around the corner, leaving the prince feeling confusingly content.

A couple of weeks later, Zachery was pacing around the palace when he turned around the corner and bumped into a fair lady, whose head was buried into a book with a cover laden with intricate gold work. He asked her where she had received the book from, and she answered him saying that it was a gift from the king for her fifteenth birthday. They got talking, and she revealed that her mother was a maid of the castle. Whilst they were talking, Zachery could not quite place where he knew her from, until he saw the bookmark. He recognised the lady to be the quiet girl from the night of the ball since her bookmark was a rose from his mother’s garden. Both of them felt lonely, and were happy to have found a friend who lived under the same roof - a roof that could actually account for dozens of roofs.

As the girl got to know the prince, she became particularly fond of him. Knowing she could never be with him, she was devastated and decided to confide in her mother. Aghast, the mother told her daughter that the enamoured feeling she had for the prince was immoral. The girl knew that her feelings for the future king could never be acted on, but she failed to understand why they were unethical. That is when Ferline explained to her daughter that she - Shaiya - was a bastard child of the King’s. Angry at her mother for not informing her before, she ran to confide in Zachery. She rushed into his arms weeping as he tried to understand what was wrong. Making him promise to be discreet about her tellings, she informed Zachery of their shared bloodline. Confused as to why her mother only told her about this now, he questioned Shaiya. She hung her guilty head in shame. Explaining that she should never have to feel ignoble, especially with him, he lifted her chin and buried his smile into her eyes. After repeated trials of trying to explain her dishonorable sentiments, Shaiya finally managed to croak her feelings for him. Zachery simply smiled at her, pushed the hair in her face behind her ears, leaned in, and softly laid his lips on hers.

In the eyes of the public, they portrayed themselves as platonic friends. But when no one was watching, they stole kisses from each other at every opportune moment that they could snatch. This mutual agreement of secrecy continued on for an entire year. 

On Shaiya’s sixteenth birthday, Zachery took her to Toura lake to go light a lantern and set then it free. She sat on his lap with his head resting on her left shoulder as they watched the lantern disappear into the horizon. After the lantern was no longer in their line of sight, they laid back on the grass and gazed at the brilliant moon whilst holding hands and speaking of sweet nothings. Wanting to express their intense love for each other, they decided to lay together. And so they did, their hips dancing together - rocking to and fro - under the fragmented moonlight that broke through the leaves of the trees.

Morning-rays-come, Shaiya felt confident that people would accept the both of them as one. Sharing her thoughts with Zachery, he begged to differ. Heartbroken, she had no choice but to swear to confidentiality if she wanted to be with him. They continued to the castle and returned to their old ways of stealing loving glances and intimate touches.

Years passed by as they maintained their relationship. However, she grew tired of being his sin. The sea of love Shaiya had for him, gradually evaporated - one drop a day. The sea in her heart started out by running a vibrant sapphire. The day her heart dried out, unveiling an inky void, was the day Prince Zachery woke up to a dehydrated sable sapphire rose from his mother’s garden. Shaiya was never heard of again.

Wednesday, March 20, 2013

Awkward If The Teacher Ever Finds Out

Dude. Weirdest shit ever. I dreamt that I was in one of my teacher's office. He was tutoring me because I got a bad grade in my last test. We were talking, and all of a sudden he kisses me. I immediately pull away and tell him that he needs to bump up my last test grade or I tell. Instead, he changes all my grades too 100% ~ and that made me feel bad. And the rest I don't remember.

Speaking of test grades...I was in the locker room, changing to get ready for personal fitness. I had just had a test, so I told this girl who was about to take it that it was hard and she should study. This girl gets confused because this other girl in the locker room had told her it was relatively easy. I said, maybe it's just me. I didn't get a good grade. So they asked me what I got. I said 90%. Then they looked at me like, WTF? And I tried explaining that it dropped my average from a 96% to a 94%. Once I said that out loud, I realised how stupid I sounded, so I shut up.

Monday, March 18, 2013

To Friend? Or Not To Friend?

So there is this one friend of mine that I keep getting into fights with. The thing is, though, we always manage to patch things up. That's what I like about her. She's so chill. It's hard to find that in people. I remember this other friend of mine, I didnt even do anything to her, and she stopped talking to me because of something I did when I was drunk. After that she said I was an attention-seeking whore to my friends. She's an amazing person, don't get me wrong. I just think if that's the way things ended after such a strong friendship, then the friendship wasn't as strong as I thought it was. I miss it, but I'm glad things turned out the way they have. You know who your true friends are. Anywho...looks like I'm going to prom finally! One of my friends said she would go, so I get to wear the dress I designed. Woot Woot! And if the girl who I keep getting into fights with reads this, then I just want to let you know that you're awesome <3

Friday, March 15, 2013

On Top


After having one too many, Julie thought it was about time she went home. Taking Damien by the had, she walked out of the frat party and asked Damien if he could take her back to his dorm room. Damien, who was sober, saw how drunk Julie was and understandingly agreed. He saw that Julie could barely walk, so he swept her off her feet and walked over to his car. Julie, who was especially aroused since she was intoxicated, started to kiss Damien’s neck. Damien, who had to focus on carrying her and finding his car in the dark, shrugged Julie off his neck. This disappointed and annoyed Julie, so she stopped and entered a sulky mode instead. “You’re no fun,” she whined. Finally finding his car, Damien helped Julie into it. After he was done helping her, he walked around and slid into his 1965 Cammer Fastback.

As he put his seatbelt on, Damien asked Julie to do the same. He turned back around to start driving, only to find Julie struggling to fasten her seatbelt. He undid his seatbelt in order to help. Reaching over, Damien moved closer to Julie and fastened her seatbelt. He could feel her warm breath creeping up and down his neck. Leaning away a bit, he turned his head around to face her and put his right hand on the small of her back. Slowly tracing his finger down her back, he whispered, “and you say I was no fun” as he grabbed her g-string, pulled it back, and then let go as it smacked the top of her ass.

Her face lit up as she looked at him with seductive, fuck-me eyes. Undoing Julie’s seatbelt, Damien pulled her on top of him. He tilted his seat back as she drove herself towards him. She pulled his lips by using hers, feverishly and passionately. After Damien undid his belt and pulled his pants down, Julie heard a tear as Damien ripped Julie’s red g-string off. He put his left hand around her narrow waist, and put his right hand on his dick, to help ease Julie onto him. Letting his right hand go, he put it around Julie’s waist. After having both his hands around her waist, he guided her up and down his cock. Damien moved back on the seat in order to change the angle of his hip, so it was higher up. This change allowed for him to penetrate Julie even deeper, sending her into a frenzied climax. Her final moan did it for him. He released himself inside of her. Exhausted, Damien hauled a blanket, he had under his seat, over them. Julie then fell asleep in Damien’s arms on the driver’s seat of the majestic black Mustang.

I'm A "Snobby Rich Kid"

Wow. Okay. So. I'm applying for college housing. My dad said I could get the deluxe double room rather than the standard double room. I'm grateful that he said that. However, it sucks because they don't have anymore double deluxe rooms. Okay - it sucks - it's not the end of the world. It's better that way I guess, because with a standard double room, I get to room with a friend of mine. So I was talking to another friend of mine, and she got all sarcastic and bitter with me and called me a "snobby rich kid," which I think was totally uncalled for. In my opinion, a "snobby rich kid" would throw a tantrum and mope around for days about how she could not get that extra closet. I am like, it sucks, but oh well, I'm still happy. Yes, I am aware that I live a luxurious life. No, I do not think that it makes me better than everyone else. No, I do not think that I deserve more than everyone else. No, I do not think I deserve special treatment. And you know a reason I thought an extra closet would be cool? Because the friend I'm half-staying with lives in a quad (four people) and there are only three closest in that room. If she needed space, I could have lent her the half of the extra closet that belongs to me. I honestly think that my friend judged me quickly and unfairly. I understand that I get a lot, but I also give a lot. I feel like she was too harsh on me, and I wish she wasn't because I just want to be friends. Cannot wait for college - I've been told that people don't really judge you. And if they do - they are mature about it and give you a chance to prove them wrong. I guess I will just have to wait and see. Hope everyone has a nice weekend :)

Thursday, March 14, 2013

Semi-Inside


Out on a double date, Julie sat next to Damien. Her brother and his girlfriend were across from her and Damien, respectively. But that did not matter. None of it did. As they were all talking, Julie subtly placed her hand on Damien’s knee. Thinking nothing of it, Damien continued to talk to Julie’s brother, Alex. As Julie and Sarah conversed, Julie circled her finger around Damien’s knee. An orgasmic sensation shuddered its way through Damien. Julie traced her index finger up and down Damien’s thigh, going higher and higher up until her hand was directly on top of his semi-hard cock. As she played around with his dick, more and more thoughts started to enter his head, including taking Julie to the restroom at the back of the restaurant.

Almost as if she had read Damien’s mind, Julie excused herself from the table and headed towards the rear of the restaurant. Damien watched her as she walked away. Just before she turned a corner, Julie took her shirt off, and looked back at Damien. Taking a hint, he followed her. As soon as he turned the corner, he felt something pull at him. Julie had found a supply closet and had pulled him in there with her. Closing the door behind Damien, Julie shoved him against the door and undid his belt. She continued to get on her knees, rapidly unzip his jeans, and pull them down along with his boxers.

She did not wait, she went straight to taking him in hard and fast. She was not licking a lollipop, she was sucking it as hard and as fast as she could to see how many licks it would take to get to the center. As Damien let out a slight grunt, Julie slowed down and sucked hard at the tip of his cock. Just one suck. Slow and hard. When Damien’s breathing became more regular, she started at him again. This time though, she took her right hand and slid it up and down his cock whilst sucking him. Building up to the climax, Damien’s breathing started to get deeper and heavier. Once again, Julie stopped, and simply licked the tip. Before Damien could completely recover, Julie started to slowly suck his cock. She deep-throated him, going all the way in, and all the way out. Gradually getting faster. She kept sucking him this time round though. Pulling out before he climaxed, Damien came all over Julie’s face. He sighed a deep sigh as he slouched down on the floor, and watched his cum trickle down her cheek.

Wednesday, March 13, 2013

Moving to Moscow

Looks like it's official - we're moving to Moscow, Russia. I'm going to college, but at least I would have come back to Shanghai over the winter break. Now I'm stuck going to friggin Russia where I know no one. On the bright side, it is a new place to explore. And it's in europe, which means it won't cost that much to tour the rest of Europe - at least I don't think so.

But that's just one part of my day. The other part is having the fact that my mum prefers my sister over me in my face. It is so fucking obvious and it hurts like fuck. When my mum comes back home from work, I ask her how her day is. She says it was good and retires to her room. I go back in my room, my mum calls for my sister to come downstairs and tell her about her day. Great to know my mum is interested in my life.

Thinking about it, what is there for me in Shanghai? Friends? No. Good memories that outweigh the bad ones? No. The only think I'll actually miss is the place. I guess that makes life easier. One of the perks of being a loner, more-or-less.

Ohdeargod - this post sounds so pitiful.
*facepalm*

Sunday, March 10, 2013

Muffled Screams

I just watched "Silver Linings Playbook" - I can't say much really other than the movie punched me in the gut. After the movie, I calmly excused myself (I was watching it with my family), went downstairs to my room, locked myself in my bathroom, and cried. I cried. I muffled my screams by biting into my towel. That movie made me realise what I look like from the outside. I mean I know I'm fucked up - but that just opened my eyes on a whole new level; a deeper and darker level.

Saturday, March 9, 2013

Smart Guy=Sexy

Ohdeargod - such an awkward situation. I was walking back home from carrefour, just eating a donut, when I bumped into this guy. He was gorgeous. Greek. He just graduated from UMich. So he's 23... He said he would buy me another donut, so I was like...free donut - whoopie. We flirted a little, then talked about serious issues (smart guy=sexy). We were about to part ways, when he asked me what I was doing in Shanghai. I said I was a student. He asked, which university? I burst out laughing and his face = priceless. He worriedly asked if I was a freshie in high school. I told him to relax and that I'm turning 18 in 2 months. Either way, the conversation ended there and we both went our separate ways. Conclusion. Interesting day....which is about to get a little bit more interesting if all goes right ;)

Friday, March 8, 2013

Rumours

I keep thinking that the real world is going to get better than high school. That once I leave this place, I will never have to deal with rumours again. But today, I read an article that begs to differ. There is this new media frenzy where people have stopped buying meat from this one firm, because this idiot doesn't know shit. I don't know if you have heard, but people are going crazy (and not in a good way) over 'pink slime'. What had happened was that there was a break out of e coli or something of that sort. So the guy in this firm, in order to prevent it from happening, came up with the idea to spray ammonia gas over the meat. FYI, ammonia gas is not the same as ammonia liquid. This tv show, then proceeded to question the use of ammonia before getting their facts right. Instead of using gas, they used liquid to clean the meat. And with that, this sort of pink slime came out. Which did not happen at the firm, because they used the gas. Now, they had to shut down three of their factories, and fire 700 people. Just because this idiot did not get his facts straight. This wasn't some silly high school rumour, but a dire rumour that has ruined the lives of many. It's amazing what one person can do. Amazingly horrid. This other firm tried doing the same thing, but they didn't do it the right way, so some people ended up dying. But as for the firm, where there are no reported incidents of death due to the eating of their meat, they have to suffer the consequences. Think about it, would you rather have safer meat (which does not harm you if you do it the right way), which is safer because of a chemical, or would you have people dying everywhere because of e coli and it's deathly friends? A lot of people are complaining about processed meat - what else are you going to expect when there is such a high demand for it. People at least get meat. Think of all the poor people who have to solely rice and vegetables, or even less than that. Sorry...I just needed to rant about this whole ridiculous situation. Then again, this is just my opinion and you are entitled to yours. 

Thursday, March 7, 2013

Slut

Fuck society. Why does slut have to be such a degrading word? Sure, call someone a slut, a girl version of a player. It's always hallelujah when a guy is called a player, but when a girl is called a slut, it's all shit. And what is worse is that girls complain about it all the time, and we don't stop it, we just enhance it by bitching about and calling each other sluts. I used to think of it as a derogatory term, but then I realised that I hate it when people call me a slut. Treat others the way you want to be treated, right? I remember weird used to be such an insult to me, now I love it when someone calls me weird, because that means I am abnormal, which means I am not boring. Girls, if someone calls you a slut, take it as an opinion. You dress and do whatever the hell you want - so kudos to you. And no.....this isn't supposed to be satire. I'm not trying to be all feministic, to a point where I don't shave because guys don't. I'm just saying that we all need to think about this, and take a stance.

Wednesday, March 6, 2013

Selfish

Sometimes I feel like a spoilt brat and it pisses me off. I live a luxurious life...extremely luxurious actually. Today when I was talking to my friends, I said something about my ayi (maid) making my bed. Then I was talking to mum, and she said the shelf in her cupboard broke under the weight of all the purses. I found out how much my dad makes...and I feel so bad to be privileged. I'm not complaining, don't get me wrong. When I grow up, someway, somehow, I'm going to give back to my parents (charity starts at home - give them what they paid for my college), and give back to the world. When I was in Kolkata, India, working with orphans and mentally and physically challenged children, that's when I felt like I had at least SOME purpose in life. People say life is short...it's too short to be selfish.

Tuesday, March 5, 2013

Inside


She stood idly by, in the rain, as she rang the doorbell. Damien opened the door and was surprised to see Julie. He scanned over her, only to notice how wet and tight her red tank top looked, sticking onto her skin. His eyes ran down from her eyes, to her bare neck, then to the curves of her breast, landing on how short her skirt was. “Damien? Hi! What are you doing here and where is my brother?” She closed in on him for a hug, and pressed up against him as she did so. Damien could feel Julie’s warm breath down his neck and the feel of her breasts against his chest turned him on. “We just got back from uni. Your brother dropped me off and told me to make myself at home. He said that he was staying at his girlfriend’s place for the night, your parents were away, and that you were at a sleepover.”
“Yeah, my friend is a bitch. So I’m back.”
“You must be cold, let me get you a towel?”
“Do you even know where the towels are?”
“No, but I could lend you my shirt?” Julie loved the idea of that, and her eyes traced his hands as they unraveled one button after another. After Damien handed Julie his shirt, she asked him to close his eyes. When she told him that he could open his eyes, he ended up seeing Julie in just his shirt. “You know, Jules, that shirt is see-through?”
“Yeah? And?”
“And you’re not wearing any underwear?”
“I know.”

Julie sat on the couch and turned the TV on. She eyed Damien and gave him a seductive look, gesturing him to sit on the couch next to her. He sat on the sofa, towards the very left. Julie sat next to him with her back against him and her knees against her chest. Damien turned the TV on, and EuroTrip was on. Having watched this movie numerous times, Julie got really bored, really fast. They started the movie in the middle, but as it neared the end, Julie took Damien’s arm from behind her back, and pulled it so he was holding her in his arms. His hands lingered in between her legs. She could feel his fingertips barely touching the surface of her pussy. She moved so that his fingers were firm against her. He could feel how moist she was, and started playing around with her. After playing around with her for a bit, he started waving his fingers around inside her, going deeper and deeper. He didn’t go fast though. He tortured her. She wanted him inside of her so bad, that his fingers weren’t going to cut it. Curling her toes and breathing in heavily, he pulled his two fingers out as the movie ended. She was obviously mad because he wasn’t making any moves on her, and she was sick of doing all the initiating. 

As Julie started to storm off, Damien pulled her into his arms by her waist. He grabbed her ass and pulled her until she was right against his cock. Julie smiled at him as she unbuttoned his jeans. After she finished unzipping him, Damien pushed Julie onto the couch and pushed his way inside of her. He could feel how wet and tight her pussy was as he penetrated her. Julie’s moans got louder and louder as he started thrusting into her faster and harder. His eight inch dick hurt Julie, but she loved every moment of it. She could feel him pushing inside of her. Going deeper, and deeper, and deeper.

As they rolled over, Damien fell on the floor and pulled Julie on top of him. The force of his dick inside of her made her scream out in pleasure. She slid up and down his penis, slightly moving her hips around so every part inside of her could feel him. He watched sweat dribble down her body as her breasts bounced up and down. He was ready to burst any second now, but he wasn’t quite there.

He turned Julie over, putting a pillow underneath her butt. He could now push himself deeper inside her. He could feel how soaked she was. As he kept pushing up against her g-spot, Julie got shivers. Just as she climaxed, she could feel Damien’s cum run inside of her. Julie let out one last moan as she grew limp. Both of them tired, fell asleep on the carpet.

With all the rattling and all the sunshine beaming through the curtains, Damien woke up to find Julie in the kitchen, in her birthday suit. She was at the counter, with her back towards him. Damien quietly snuck behind her, and kissed her neck. “I’m hungry, you know,” Damien said in between kisses.
“What would you like to eat? I can make eggs? I make really good scrambled eggs.”
“Nahhh.” Julie looked at him, confused. “I was thinking of something more...tight, and hopefully wet.”
“Let’s feed you then.” As Julie suggested, Damien propped her up on the kitchen counter and she laid flat on her back. Her body pulsated as Damien got more intense with pacing his tongue over her clit. When it got to be too much, Julie arched her back until she was sitting up and then looked at Damien with eyes so seductively deep.

She slid off the counter, then revolved 180°. Given that cue, Damien gently bent her over the counter and pushed his cock inside of her. With her arms spread out in front of her, Julie could feel the cold counter under her breasts. He could only reach so far inside of her, so Julie told him to hold up. After he pulled out of her, Julie hopped onto the counter so she could face him. Without further ado, he rammed himself against her, fucking her hard and fast, the way she wanted. Damien felt that he could go deeper if Julie was still, so he lifted her up and made her loudly moan after slamming her against the wall. Her hands were wrapped around his neck, and his large hands were holding her up by her thighs. She screamed out in pleasure as he came inside of her, just as her entire family opened the door.

Saturday, March 2, 2013

Tits, Glorious Tits!

A lot of people think having big boobs is a great thing. Let me tell you one thing...no. just...no.

  1. You can't jog
  2. You can't jump
  3. You can't run down the stairs without holding your tits
  4. You look like a prostitute in pretty much anything
  5. The first thing guy's notice about you are your boobs
  6. It is hard to find clothes that accommodate to your boobs - either you look like you're wearing a sack, or that you're a balloon on the verge of popping
  7. And once you find clothing that works for you, it's hard to find something elegant
  8. It's hard to find places where they sell sexy bras in your size - I mean you can get the bras that make your boobs look like cones...
  9. It's hard to find places where they sell sport bras - which do little to no help at all when it comes to containing your babies when you're running
  10. People automatically assume your IQ is inversely proportional to your bra size
  11. Lying on your stomach is either impossible, or hurts like a bitch
  12. They sag faster
  13. When the clothes come off, guys expect them to be all perky
  14. Giving guy friends a hug often leads to boners
  15. Tits are fucking distracting - whether it be for onlookers, or for yourself (yes, I get distracted by my own tits)
The list can go on and on, but for the sake of avoiding the boredom realm, I shall cease my rant - which started when I went to H&M today, tried on a beautiful elegant green dress, and looked like I was trying to sneak out two melons or something of that sort. What I'm trying to say is that people are content with what they are given. But as the saying goes, when life gives you lemons, break out the tequila (that was totally out of context and therefore made no fucking sense).